Thursday, July 12, 2007

To anonymous

I can't comment on my comments because I lost my password, so here's your answer.

I totally agree with you. I don't think wanting to go on the beach in front of my house without being screamed at and threatened, or wanting my friends not to be intimidated and threatened---by the so called cool people---is "desperately trying to fit in."
That's what I want, and I think it's more than my right.
Yes, as I think I've said before, I am much too old for high school cliques and games and gossip.
I just want to go on the beach and in the water in peace.
The "cool" people are trying to make that impossible.
How would you deal with it? I agree about being positive, but what about when hate is all up in your face?

In other news, surfing was miserable today. The water was freezing and though I caught some waves I could not get up in any way, shape, or form. I'd have done better going for a swim. Well, at least this means the next session will be good.

7 Comments:

At Thursday, July 12, 2007 6:52:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Cool, glad to hear from you. Sorry when I came across your blog just recently I did not dig back to discover all the details you have been going through with these people. I will try to do a bit more reading next time.
You are absolutely right that you should not have to put up with that kind of in your face abuse, in front of your beach home or anywhere for that matter.
I personally have been very lucky as far as in the water, most people who know me say I am one of the most stoked people they know when it comes to surfing. So I can not say what I would do untill it was to actually happen to myself personally. Though I do frequent a local surf message board and for the first two years on it, I took crap from everyone. True it got very tiresome but I tried most sucsessfully I might add to only respond with positive posts to their negativity. While it took what seemed like forever to get the "Local" core group to stop trying to slam me on every post I posted, it eventully happened. One of the guys who use to slam me relentless one day confessed to me that the reason he did it was because he was jelous of how much surfing time I was getting in and when he read my posts he would get pissed because I was so stoked about it.
All I can suggest to you is to stay positive and do not let them drag you into their negativity. Those kinds of people thrive on pulling you down in order to feel better about themselves.

Try going to sign in and see if they have an area for forgot your password. Works for me... sometimes..lol

 
At Friday, July 13, 2007 4:58:00 AM, Blogger Tillerman said...

Is this immature, high-school-ish, cliquey, spiteful attitude typical of surfers? Or are you just unlucky in having some jerks using your favorite beach?

Anonymous mentions that he/she got some crap on a local surf message board. I do think those boards and forums bring out the worst in people. In the sailing world there's one popular fourm (Sailing Anarchy) where it's common for threads to degenerate into abuse and name-calling. And I came across another boating forum where some guy with the same alias as me (tillerman) seems to be the target of everyone's spite.

But I do have to say that in eal world sailing (at various clubs and locations on two continents) I have never come across the kind of unwelcoming behaviour that you write about so often.

Maybe the sports are different in that respect. In general sailors tend to feel that the more boats are out racing the more fun it is for everyone. Whereas I guess you surfers are to some extent getting in each others way and competing for that perfect wave if there's too many of you in one spot?

 
At Monday, July 16, 2007 8:18:00 PM, Blogger Grandma said...

Grandma again. Tillerman, really this has nothing to do with surfing. These are not necessarily surfers, but they are people who cultivate the "surf lifestyle". I., for instance, can't surf at all, but simply embraced posturing as a surfer as a way to find a social life she desperately wanted. The others can mostly surf, but there are also plenty of people who can surf who don't give bollocks about the "surf lifestyle". E. also got into the "surf lifestyle" long before she could ever surf, which she does modestly now. The question is, is there something about "the surf lifestyle" that attracts assholes? And what is "the surf lifestyle" anyway? From what I can see it's just high school all over again, and people so insecure they can only feel good about themselves by cutting other people down.

 
At Friday, July 20, 2007 8:03:00 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

"The question is, is there something about "the surf lifestyle" that attracts assholes? And what is "the surf lifestyle" anyway? From what I can see it's just high school all over again, and people so insecure they can only feel good about themselves by cutting other people down."

I think you will find this behavior in many differnt activities not just surfing. I am pretty sure the people who are surfer assholes would be assholes even if they did not surf.
The surfing lifestyle is not something that one size fits all.
There is an old saying that goes, it only takes one bad apple to ruin the barrel. Sounds like your barrel has a bunch of bad apples.
Keep in mind that not all apples are bad and those that are not rotten also make up the barrel.

 
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